I absolutely hate these feelings of guilt that I am having about my kids right now. As I wrote the other day that I am having a flare, I feel guilty because my kids aren't understanding it. They keep asking me to play with them but I just don't have the energy to do anything but survive right now. I'm very lucky that they are less then a year apart and truly enjoy playing with each other but even they have their limits. I took them to a movie yesterday and will take them to my daughter's ice show today and then lunch but without having any more energy we will probably come home and watch tv. It doesn't help that the weather is rainy so I can't even let them go outside and play. I hope and pray that by tomorrow I will have the energy to take them to the playground and play with some friends.
This just sucks and I hate feeling like my disease is running both my life and my children's lives.
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Your children are lucky to have a mother that worries so much about their happiness, even in the time of her own inflictions. As the child of a Lupus patient I can understand what your children might fell, my mother was diagnosed when I was five and later with steroid induced necrosis, and it took me a long time to realize how much an active day effects her. I'll be praying for you.
ReplyDeleteMarcus Crosby
marcusbcrosby@gmail.com