Thursday, January 7, 2010

What do people REALLY think?

As I sit here preparing for a GI procedure in a week and a surgery in about 3 weeks I wonder what people really think.  I know that I have legitimate problems, such as lupus and that doctors don't perform surgery just for the sake of it but sometimes I feel like such a hypochondriac.  I know that I shouldn't worry about what people think but how many times can I go through medical problems and still be able to depend on my friends.  It just doesn't seem fair to them and I know that if I was them I would start to tune me out...I even tune myself out.   I really don't want all of these problems and try to downplay them as much as possible but after awhile it seems like an attention getting behavior, which I swear it isn't.  Sometimes I just want to burrow down into bed and stay there until everything gets better.

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